Alrighttttt,
Let's continue this "Life of Ease" conversation.
I turned 33 on October 10th. 33, "The Jesus Year".
*very loud exhale*
33 feels like such a serious age. Like... am I... am I an adult? Like, I'm grown huh? Paying own bills, feeding myself, scheduling my own doctor's appointments... GROWN.
What did that girl say?.... EEEEEEEEYUUUUCKKKK.
How did we even get here? At what point did time speed up? I still vividly remember being in high school, so wrapping my head around my current reality is a lot to say the least.
Anyhow, the last 37 days have been a whirlwind of which I could've never prepared for. I just... Idk.
I'm going to do my best to give you a little more info.
Alright, for my 33rd birthday I knew I wanted to feel celebrated, period.
I wanted it to be very much about Racquel. I give freely to everyone that I encounter, daily and for once I wanted to be poured into. And considering I spent my 32nd birthday crying on my kitchen floor, this was necessary. It was almost crucial, honestly. I had to get that time back, I owed it to myself. So, the Wednesday before my birthday I had a BAPS themed tea party, we called it "Racquel's Tea POrty". The girlies came in grills, golds, rings, and chains while wearing their country club-style dresses. They understood the assignment, and your girl was pleased. During the POrty, my hostesses asked all of my guests to write a letter to me, expressing their love for me. And when I realized what was happening, I loudly said "Well that's dumb.".
*Chuckles*
I knew these girls were about to have me bawling behind the written sentiments of their hearts, and I wasn't ready to feel all of those things. (For context, I'm JUST now finishing reading those letters... 'cause I needed to take my time.) But again, I wanted to be poured into, and the Lord made sure my cup was overflowing.
By the weekend, it was time to travel! My birthday was on that Friday, so my dad & I planned a getaway in Toledo. We had never done anything like this, and I was so excited. I needed my dad in multiple ways, and as always, he delivered.
We flew into Detroit, and planned to get a rental car to drive to Toledo. We got to the rental location, and they upgraded us to a black Jeep... *loud sigh*, Lord, I miss that baby. We got to the hotel that he booked, and it had a lakeside view. (We both love water and a view) We explored the city together, while he opened every door, waited on me without rushing, and was my professional photographer everywhere we went. He was so very intentional, and I felt like the most loved girl in the world. How kind of God, ya know?
That Saturday, thanks to a good friend, we went to watch some college football. Now, if you know me... hello. I was in pure heaven, HEAVEN. The stadium, the crowd, the noise, the band, all of it gave me the greatest rush.
Everything I had asked of God, all of my heart's desires were met, actually exceeded. And I'm still beaming at the thought of the love that was shown to me.
*Happy Sigh*
The week was absolutely perfect, and you know what it did for me? It raised the standard.
If my girls love me so fiercely, if my family protects me, if my friends pray for & pour into me, if my dad treats me like a literal Princess, and if I'm chosen by the Lord... why in God's name am I accepting bare minimum... from anybody? *Head tilt*
How dare I settle, as if the Lord hasn't surrounded me with His best. How dare I accept anything less than what I give, freely.
All of a sudden, boundaries formed, conversations ensued, and phone got a bit desert-ish, if you will.
But I have peace in knowing that I am heavily surrounded with good things. And quite frankly, Racquel will never play about Racquel, every again.
I'm... literal royalty.
Selah.
Talk soon,
Racq